‘Alaskan Bush People Recap’: A Wind and a Prayer Season Finale

According to last nights episode, the usual announcer said, “Tonight on the season finale of Alaskan Bush People….”, but then I see in the little of corners of my little TV, “Primere of Alaskan Bush People, Wednesday at 9 pm”. To say the least I’m a little confused? We shall see, but I do believe ABP was the season finale…so onto the turbine….again.

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I’ll explain the featured image later…oh that Bear!

Matt starts off the show looking straight into a “real” Bear, explaining about the Bears  tracks and his. Then that’s it?

For the hundredth time, the “family is facing the winter season”. The Bears are 3 miles per square mile according to Matt, that’s why last week a Bear got into the meat locker. So Matt and “Bear” are looking for that Bear in different territories.

Snow, no snow…strange weather. Walking around, they both say it’s clear…too bad I’d love to see a “real” Bear attacking Bear!

Billy and the clan is down to scenes and talk about..you guessed it, the TURBINE! So while on Prince Island they bartered with this guy for the turbine (funny I didn’t see that?) and he would get red cedar wood cleared by Matt’s, so called saw mill.. it buckled. As usual with the Browntown clan, every time they barter something happens..every time. Will the guy accept the wood? Will they get their turbine parts?

Now to Bear he is painting the tail of the turbine with real paint, yet last time he got bush berries for paint, but these are cans of paint. So Bear goes to town to get paint, but explains he’s using the tail of a deer to so call “caveman paint, never leave anything unused”.

If that’s the case why didn’t he get all the crazy colors of the bush to paint? This family confuses me with every episode!

Poor Noah, he’s racing to Hoonah to see his girlfriend. She contacted him due to news that has to be discussed. A man in love..ahhh. He’s concerned.

Noah is loosing his girlfriend, sob, she can’t find a job and has to move back to Oregon. Noah says he will do everything in his power to have her to stay…including..shock…moving her to Browntown!

The next day the clan is waiting for Wes, he’s the owner of the..turbine parts…standing and waiting..waiting and staring at the bay, but hold on “look at that spec is that a boat?” Matt says. Now they’re worrying cause Matt doesn’t have enough red cedar. Noah says everything looks great for the turbine, it actually looks NOTHING like the part that was going on last time!

 

Wes is expecting more. He doesn’t like the amount of wood and won’t barter for the machine. As usual…only on ABP & Discovery Channel, there’s always a way out. Before Bam left, he coincidentally was cutting wood for the floor of his new house. Wes wants part of Bams portion of red cedar. It’s not Billy’s to barter so they vote. Wes says the turbine is expensive and won’t leave it without the other red cedar. Matt says, “I was in with Bam on this”. Yet they still vote, and of course it’s a done deal…I knew that without watching it. WE HAVE THE TURBINE!!

They start organizing and push to finish the turbine as quickly as possible. So here’s goes the explanation of the feature image. IMG_2989Bear is attaching the tail he painted and is using his…chin to get the blots into the wing? He is ridiculous, I mean you don’t have pliers, or a hammer, to put something in the tail to attach? Come on Bear! I guess that’s why you’re the high, energized one in the clan!

Noah is talking to Matt about having another female in Browntown. Matt says if you love her, do it. Matt says, “I live very free, but it comes with a price, it’s lonely…”. Thanks bro!

All day the family works “hard” and Bird says she misses Bam, “He’s always very there and kids with everyone he knows, he’s the missing link”. That’s for sure!

In the tent Noah explains what’s he’s doing with the magnets. “They’re very powerful and strong”. Basically the magnets cause electricity and brings up his girlfriend. “This turbine serves the greatest purpose and sustains Browntown”.IMG_3017

Matt and everyone, expect Bear who is surveying the perimeter with a camp fire torch for bears, are building the turbine. Billy and Ami are in their house reminiscing about their long road, and where they are now( yeah 1 show at a time). Maybe I’m dumb but why can’t they still be on a generator while building the turbine?

IMG_3024Outside they hear movement in the brush, they all start sounding like dogs barking to ward off the bear. I personally don’t see a bear, maybe 2 eyes, but that’s it..let’s assume it’s a bear. After our usual commercial we no longer hear the rustling in the brush, and the boys are back to building in the dark. They believe it’s the bear that’s been haunting them throughout the year.

With most of the parts finished Noah and Bird are attaching the blades to the wind…I’m so tired of typing this word…turbine. Now Noah’s bringing up his girlfriend to Bird. She only likes animals and starts making fun of her…just in jest. He asks Bird how she feels about his girlfriend moving in. She doesn’t answer, but says if it makes you happy.

Finally, Billy says, “We’re ready to make or break it right now”. Bears in charge of turning the cable that turns and has to move it around so it doesn’t coil.

He gives instructions to Bear, never helps, and Noah gives instructions, “Don’t wrap your hands around it, it will burn”.

Now due to editing with this show do you all believe that a bunch of kids, are pulling cable? Bear is managing to stop it from coiling? This kind of job is done with machines pulling cable, not 4 pulling, 1 instructing, and 1 making sure it doesn’t coil! Sorry…just another Discovery Channel much edited part.

So it’s the end, they’re raising this thing. It’s tilting to the right, the cable is slipping, Bear gets underneath it, manages to get it to work, and all is well!!

How in the hell did they get it tight!! Here’s the acting, hugging, Bear says, “I don’t think we’ve actually been so excited, we did it!” Noah says now give it wind, and it starts spinning like a top! Noah says it secures Browntowns future. Billy says, “We’ve got electricity now no more getting fuel!” Bear howls, as usual. Matt says I’m stronger, I’ve discovered life is a dream but it should be, or we wouldn’t realize how good it is”. Billy ends the show with what the family has done, “We got Matt back, Bam left, Noah’s got a girlfriend…we’ve got everything, nothing’s gonna stop us now!”

And that’s the season finale, raising a turbine, actually that was the entire season. The turbine, Matt’s realization of himself, an adopted cow that now we know was a fill in cow, Bam leaving and always had that look every episode, and the biggest…Discovery Channel trying to make us believe that the Browns, reminiscing weekly, are not fake and did every single thing with just kids on the Island. IMG_3085Love it or hate it, they somehow believe it. Did you enjoy this shorter season? With all the claims of fakery? Please let me know what you thought.